Jaclyn Hill is reflecting on the past year of her life and career on Instagram.
The YouTuber shared a video on Thursday filled with clips seemingly taken over the course of 2019. At the time, she had released a lipstick line which led to massive backlash online after people said the products were damaged and caused infections. Despite the controversy, she later launched a successful line of highlighters at the end of the year.
Hill also shared a written message about what's to come in 2020, starting with the line: "2019 was the hardest year of my life for many reasons."
Jaclyn Hill's new Instagram video shows her crying over her recent highlighter collection
Though the video starts with clips of Hill looking hopeful and preparing to launch her lipsticks in 2019, it quickly cuts to screenshots of news articles about the line's failure. The video transitions once again to focus on the creation of her highlighters.
As Hill cries in a car, she can be heard saying: "I'm just so excited because this collection is so beautiful. Like we're just investing so much into it again. I just want it to be incredible. It just sucks because it's so much more than makeup — it's my dream."
She's then shown in a meeting, where she gets emotional and says: "I'm so scared to launch this."
The YouTuber also reflected on the past year of her career in the video's caption
"As you guys all witnessed last year, I launched my own cosmetic line, which has been a dream of mine for soooo long! And it was a total flop," Hill wrote on Instagram.
"I've never felt that kind of humiliation, embarrassment & disappointment in myself before," she continued. "I totally crumbled. I didn't know how to address it, I wanted to crawl into a hole & disappear. I'm still ashamed of the way I handled it, but I'm learning!"
She continued to say that while she "can't control the past," she believes she can "be better in the future."
"Thank you to everyone who has stayed with me for the past year. You are incredible!!!! I can't wait for you to see what's in store for 2020!"
Hill also addressed her rocky 2019 in her latest YouTube video
On Thursday, Hill uploaded a YouTube video called "MY WINTER FAVORITES! MAKEUP & MORE!." The video was filmed in December, but uploaded this week.
After sharing her favorite beauty products, home items, and snacks, the YouTuber thanked fans for sticking with her during a low point in her career.
"Thank you for everything this year," Hill said. "It was the worst year of my life, but I am also so thankful for the lessons that I have learned in 2019 and cannot wait to take those lessons with me into 2020 and that is the mindset we have to have."
Representatives for Jaclyn Hill did not immediately respond to Insider's request for comment.
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